Learning to Cope with Stress and Children
By John Caldecott.
Children can be a major change in your life. If you are suddenly finding it difficult to handle your children or that you are now in charge of raising children, you need to learn to handle stress, and to remain calm through out the many problems that children can ‘throw’ at your family and into your life.
To keep calm, no matter what the situation you have a few alternatives, you can make a joke about it, you can breath deeply or you can walk away. Depending on the seriousness of the situation and how upset you really are, will also determine just what you are going to do at the moment when you feel that stress attach coming on. For some, a stress attack is felt as you clench your teeth, others notice your voice is rising, and sometimes, you may even feel your heart race a bit, and for a continued time.
Facing your problems head on is going to aid in lessening stress right away. For example, your daughter just brought her boyfriend home and they are heading to her room. Simply avoid stress, by telling your daughter, sorry, friends have to stay in the family room, rules are rules. If she doesn’t like it, she will have her boyfriend leave. If you aren’t speaking your mind, you are going to feel your blood boiling the entire time they are in her room, no matter what age she is or what you may be told they are doing. Breathe deeply, and start out with a solid voice. As you approach the situation you are in control, and you are putting stress behind you. As you are in control, you are reminding the child you are the parent and that what you say goes.
What you will find is that you have many ways of remaining in control, even if your son or daughter is being defiant. Perhaps your daughter continued walking to her bedroom with her boyfriend, what are you going to do next? Make a joke about it! Go to the basement, flip all the breakers, make the house dark. Make the stay unwelcome and make it known. There will be no computer no lights, no music when the lights are out. When the daughter comes out of the room to inquire what is going on, you can sit in the family room with a few candles and state to your daughter that you don’t know what is going on, and that maybe they should come down where the lights are. You never have to let anyone know about your ‘joke’ but you will feel less stress, because you are in control.
While these situations may seem a bit silly, they can actually be quite aggravating on the parents stress levels, and health levels. It is vital to remember to control a situation, and to be in charge, you are going to feel less stress about any situation involving your child. Keep yourself under control, be in control, breathe deeply, and do something about those things in life that are causing you stress! You can use this simple story to apply to many situations your children; your teens are going to ‘throw’ at you to keep your sanity!
Godbless, John Caldecott.
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Saturday, 23 February 2008
Learning to Cope with Stress
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